a good habit.

families are good.
but when families are your friend...
they are even better.
let me explain.
my sister and i didnt get along...
up until the summer after 9th grade.
now she is my best friend.
(besides kari)
we tell each other everything.
from the boys we've kissed.
to the grade we got on our math test.
my brother and i have never been close.
but we actually have conversations now.
this is a MEGA step forward for me.
its not that we didnt get along.
we just didnt care to get to know one another.
now we care.
now on the the parentals...
most teenagers think their parents are out to get them.
right?
or am i just crazy.
up until august of '09.
this was my mind set.
my parents hated me.
they didnt like my style.
they didnt like my taste is boys.
they didnt like my music.
they didnt like me.
and blahh blahh blahh...

you get where im going.

but ever since we did stuff together as a family.
every saturday in new york.
me and my parents have gotten along much better.
butttt....
mostly what i want to talk about is my daddy.
my dad is awesome.
my mom was out of town this last couple days.
and we hung out.
i never thought hanging out with my dad could be fun
first he took me to a byu game.
we both love basketball so it was fun.
we really got into it.
and after that.
he took me to dinner.
the next day he took me and kari out to dinner.
yeah took both of us.
and on the way there he gave us boy advice.
haha.
this was awesome.
he talked about how he fell in love with my mom.
he is still madly in love with this woman.
its amazing.
then the next day.
he took me to a movie.
and bought me popcorn.
and a drink.
and he also thoroughly embarrassed me.
infront of one of my guy friends.
that works at the theater.
thanks dad!
and for today.
he took me to get ice cream.
drove me all the way to american fork.
just to go to karis work.
to get the exact ice cream.
and just to see kari.
all in all.
i never realized how good of a person my daddy is.
i guess i have never given him the time of day.
or even tried to know him.
but now that i know.
i can actually have fun with him.
im gonna make this one a habit.

sunday sunday sunday.

3:10pm.

Kari comes over for our usual movie sunday.

(Anastasia)

3:45pm

i fall asleep watching anastasia.

4:25pm

Kari runs home for family dinner.

and boyds birthday bash.

7:30pm

soren arrives at my house.

7:40pm

Kari arrives once again.

things start to get weird.

8:00pm

things go off the deep end.

soren cant control his urges.

so it gets smelly.

kari gets slap happy.

whats new.

which makes me slap happy.

which makes her even more slap happy.

which makes me even more slap happy.

...

you get the picture.

8:10pm

soren discovers the space under the vent.

never seen someone so curious&interested in something so...boring?

we call tj and tell him to come over.

8:20pm

we go upstairs.

the dogs attack us.

soren finds the dust blower.

not a good thing.

soren attacks kari with it.

we think she pees.

but thankfully.

this time she didnt.

8:40pm

tj arrives as hungry as can be.

kari serves him ALL the food in my house.

and doesnt leave any.

(FAST FORWARD)

11:45pm

kari is still over.

(i wont let her leave)

still slap happy.

has happy hands now.

we are tired.

so naturally we find everything funny.

EVERYTHING.

we have taken multiple pictures on iphoto.

which i probably will not remember half of them in the morning.

we are just on one.

and still goin strong.

nights like these are what best friends are for.

i can do hard things.

the last month and a half has been a trying one.
to say the least.
its that moment in my life where everything seems to be going terribly wrong.
school.
its going down hill.
one of my NYR was to graduate.
i thought that would be easy.
but...its not.
i havent been as close to some of my friends as i would like.
i have been learning way too much about myself.
sometimes.
i wish i could be a stranger to myself.
if that makes sense.
i have to remind myself everyday.
to get out of bed.
i have to push myself to get dressed.
and i have to have my mother pull me out the door.
to get to school.
my senior year isnt everything i thought it would be.
its been better.
and its been worse.
in all.
completely different than i thought it would be.
i have to remember though.
that there are so SO many people around me.
that really love me.
not that fake it to get higher socially.
not that only like me for my looks.
not that like me because of things i may have.
sometimes i forget that.
but i need to focus more on the people that love me for me.
that will make things easier.
life is unfair.
life is crazy.
life is hard.
but i just need to remember everyday.

I CAN DO HARD THINGS.